tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC May 17, 2011 12:00am-1:05am EDT
stuff, good stuff," as the shuttle lifted away. thank you for watching "nightline" and abc news. "gma" will have the very latest in the morning. check in with us at anytime at abcnews.com. see you tomorrow. tonight on "jimmy kimmel live" -- >> if the taliban starts following you on twitter, hide where no one will find you, myspace, friendster. >> kate hudson. >> if you leave your daughter with the devil or charlie sheen, i think you're going with the devil, right? ♪ [ rock ]
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>> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy kimmel with exciting news. jimmy kimmel live now has an app. here now with all the details, our spokesmodel katie. hello, katie. how are you? go ahead. >> we are pleased to -- you katie -- what was that? sorry. >> yours is in blue. >> hello, i'm pleased to be here to introduce the jimmy kimmel live app. >> we are pleased to have you, katie. tell us about some the app's features. >> with the jimmy kimmel live app, you can watch video from the show anywhere on the go. >> jimmy: even like in the tub? >> i mean, if it's waterproof. >> jimmy: even at the circus?
>> i mean, sure if you want to -- what if you lose it on a roller coaster? >> i. >> jimmy: even if you're ride ago unicorn? heav heaven? >> it would be hard to ride and hold this at the same time. >> jimmy: okay, back to the cue cards. >> you can read all jimmy's hilarious personal tweets. it's free and available on the ipad, iphone and touch. >> jimmy: how do we install the app? >> simply go to the apple store. type the name. >> jimmy: type who's name? theirs or mine. >> yours. and wait for it to download and install. >> jimmy: it's so he'seasy, eve can do it. thanks, katie. >> jimmy: "jimmy kimmel live" is back in two minutes with windell middlebrooks, music from raphael saadiq and kate hudson. [ male announcer ] the magnificent veatrice henson
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>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- kate hudson. from "body of proof," windell middlebrooks. and music from raphael saadiq. with cleto and the cletones. ♪ it's jimmy kimmel live and now, in all honesty, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everyone. thank you for watching. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming out. [ cheers and applause ]
i appreciate your enthusiasm. let me ask you, who's ready to p-a-r-t-i? [ applause ] i spelled it with an "i." i'm going to start off with some sad news tonight. i don't want to bring you down but the oprah-pocalypse is near. there are only nine more oprah shows until -- until we die i guess. we'll die, right, without her? today's oprah was her last ever makeover extravaganza. today was oprah's last ever makeover extravaganza. from here on out, we're on our own. they'll be makeovers. there won't be extravaganzas. they'll be occasional "vaganzas" but no "extravaganzas." in chicago, the mayor gave oprah her own street. it's called oprah winfrey way. as you can see there. tell you one thing, it's going to be fun to give directions now.
like, take michigan avenue and hang a left on oprah. stay on oprah for about a mile. you can't miss it. [ laughter ] oprah's already looking ahead to life after chicago. she told the "chicago tribune" she's planning to fulfill a lifelong dream by appearing on broadway. finally after 26 years of singing every guest's name, it's finally paid off. [ laughter ] [ imitating oprah ] ♪ hugh jackman oprah hasn't said which broadway show she wants to do. she's looking at scripts. my sources tell me she's leaning towards "les misre oprah." [ laughter ] but my sources are idiots. i don't know what oprah's planning to do on broadway. but if she's looking for ideas, i have one that, "a," she's welcome to use, and "b" i think will be a very big hit. >> it's "everybody gets a car." the new broadway musical where everybody gets a car. you get a car. and you get a car. everybody gets a car. "i got a car," raves "the new york times." "i got a car," gushes "the daily news." and michael feingold of "the
village voice" says, "if you only see one show this year where you get a car, make 'everybody gets a car' the one." "everybody gets a car." tickets on sale now. children under 16 get a bike. >> jimmy: well, that's nice. [ cheers and applause ] ticket prices are -- start at $24,000. but i think it's worth it. tonight on "american idol," it was elimination night. i wish steven tyler would eliminate those beads in his hair. i tell you. it's starting to look like a christmas tree. james durbin was eliminated tonight from "american idol." i guess this was a big surprise. and on saturday morning, he'll be eliminated from our memories, too. [ laughter ] watch this. when the contestants get eliminated, they're asked to sing one last song which is a very cruel thing to do. james sang paul mccartney's song "maybe i'm amazed." keep an eye on randy here. he goes up to the judges' table. singing in their faces. there's the fist. and -- sorry, dog, no pound for
you. [ laughter ] last night, they ran like a little promo thing at the top of the show. look at this. read it especially. tonight they need your vote. then they show scotty and -- send them home as heroes. heroes? [ laughter ] the navy s.e.a.l.s who killed bin laden are heroes. [ applause ] these are karaoke singers. [ laughter ] if "american idol" contestants are heroes, than in the immortal words of tina turner, we don't need another hero. in fact, steven tyler, by the way, as the judges now do every week, debuted a video for his new song. if you miss the show, you still want to hear what the song sounds like, you can go on itunes and buy it or just grab a cat and choke it.
and while steven's new single just dropped, his testosterone levels have not. it would not be a thursday without his lecherous gaze. it's time now for steven tyler's creepy leer of the night. ♪ i'm going home ♪ gonna load my shotgun ♪ if he wants a fight ♪ now he's got one ♪ he ain't seen me crazy yet >> jimmy: that's a double dose there. [ applause ] caught in the rearview mirror. there was some late-breaking show biz news tonight regarding the future of "two and a half men" but i don't know if you heard, charlie sheen left that show to go crazy. [ laughter ] according to "the hollywood reporter," sources close to the deal confirm that charlie sheen will be replaced by ashton kutcher. either that or charlie sheen just got majorly punked. [ laughter ] that half a man is about to be
glued to a toilet seat. they say the deal has been finalized. as soon as ashton tweets it, it's official. so that's something, huh? i wonder if that means wilmer valderamma will get the jon cryer part? [ laughter ] this is kind of disturbing. i pray that you are familiar with "the situation" from the show "the jersy shore," yes? [ applause ] mike "the situation" is apparently having some family problems. his father, frank "the situation" sorantino, is very upset with his son. apparently asked him for money and didn't get it. so he did what most parents would do in this situation with "the situation," is he made videos trashing his son and put them on the internet. this is why i never let my rock-hard abdominal muscles get in the way of my relationship with my dad. but this is one of a number of videos in which frank, who's nicknamed himself "the confrontation" by the way, gives his son a piece of his mind. >> all i can say is, listen, mike, you got a [ bleep ]
problem, you want to [ bleep ] say something, you could call me up and you could tell me. you don't have to run around the [ bleep ] bush, hide behind a [ bleep ] wall, e-mail me like some [ bleep ] telephone tough guy. you got something to say, [ bleep ] say it. or else shut the [ bleep ] up, okay? and we'll go from there. because the last time i saw you in june, you wanted to suck my [ bleep ], okay? so don't come off like some type of tough guy, mike, because in the world i come from, if you want to dance with somebody, you make sure you know who you're going to ask to dance. and if you want to dance with me, mike, you should be ready to get out there and go for it. >> jimmy: i think he just invited his son to the prom with him, right? [ laughter ] i don't know what happened there. [ applause ] but i tell you, what a -- what a lovely man. [ laughter ] you can see where "the situation" got his total lack of any redeeming qualities.
tmz's reporting that "the situation sr." wants his own reality show but would also consider hosting a talk show. after seeing his work, i think he'd be better with children's programming. [ laughter ] i'm captain f'ing kangaroo. understand? or he could be the voice of an animated character. tonight, we took the audio from one of his rants about his son and we combined it with video from a claymation show called "creature comforts" and i think you'll agree it's a perfect fit. >> i had to get mike another job. i put him with my friend who owned a big construction company. but mike was heavy working out at that time. used to love to pose. flex, show his stomach, his ab muscles. he's working up there with some 30-year-old women. he caught the attention of one of them. she decide that she wants to [ bleep ] his [ bleep ] she gives him a [ bleep ] in the office. she gets caught. michael claims sexual harassment. can you imagine this?
this [ bleep ] guy, this clown wants to go and claim sexual harassment for some 40-year-old broad [ bleep ] his [ bleep ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: andrew dice claymation. you like yourself with that dumb mouth? this is pretty good. you know, whenever someone jumps up and down down behind a local news reporter, we find it and bring it to you for the whole nation to enjoy. usually, the animals jumping up and down in the background are people. tonight, we have our first ever camal-themed edition of "behind the news." >> two of the dogs are in isolation at hanover animal control. they're still looking for the other two. meanwhile, other livestock owners -- [ laughter ] get it out. [ applause ] >> jimmy: camels love hair. [ applause ] president, our president, president obama, must be feeling
pretty good about himself right now. his approval rating is at a two-year high, 62%, in the wake of the death of osama bin laden. people like that. if i was him, i'd fish bin laden out of the ocean and kill him every sunday. [ laughter ] i don't know why, but i've been obsessed with how crappy bin laden's tv was. did you see the videos? look at this thing. that's some justice, you know, that for the last five years, he's been huddled around a 12 inch black and white zenith. fiddling with the rabbit ears to get a signal while we watch blurays on our 65-inch flat screens, right? [ applause ] they killed him in his underwear, by the way. this is something we learned today. when the navy s.e.a.l.s came in, he was prancing around in his underwear like lady gaga. and they killed -- she's very popular. the taliban, by the way, is now on twitter. so be careful. it's -- if the taliban starts following you on twitter, hide where no one will find you. like go to myspace, go to friendster, one of those.
so far, all they posted are retweets of justin bieber. but i think we can have fun with the taliban on tweeter. my plan is to freak them out by sending tweet picks of women with their ankles showing. this is pretty great. as those of you in the studio knows, hollywood boulevard has men and occasionally women who dress up like superheroes and stand out on street taking pictures with tourists for tips. some have migrated to las vegas where batman ran into a real-life joker. look at this. this is -- somebody videotaped this. there's batman. and something's going on there. it looks like they're playing around but you'll see in a minute that they're not playing around. he's playing around. batman's getting mad.
you see batman might be related to "the situation" there. now the shoving starts. watch this fighting style. look at this. this is -- a batman slap fight. i don't know what batman is doing but -- suddenly batman starts getting pounded. and body slammed. and somebody call the bat-bulance. robin is going to get the crap kicked out of him when he gets home. and one more thing -- it's thursday night. time for our weekly tribute to the fcc where we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. it is "this week in unnecessary censorship." [ cheers and applause ] >> she says to you, if you don't
stick your [ bleep ] down my throat, we're through. >> when you're just at home being tom hanks, what are you doing? >> [ bleep ] my [ bleep ]. >> the lakers are [ bleep ], is their coach too, at 11:00. >> i'm your host. if you don't laugh, i will personally [ bleep ] your ass. >> in the hall of fame. >> three super bowls. >> used to idolize him. >> i'm a regular guy with a big [ bleep ]. >> you like [ bleep ] a [ bleep ] and that one surprised me a little bit. >> why would she say that you [ bleep ] her in the face instead of her [ bleep ] her in the face? >> i don't know that. >> you know why, you [ bleep ] her in the face because you had too much to drink. >> i tell you, [ bleep ] somebody like a pregnant woman is about as nutty as anything i've ever heard. don't do it. ♪ what shall we make today ♪ we'll make something fun >> it's a snowman [ bleep ] a
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[ applause ] and then, with music from this new album, it just came out this week, it's called "stone rollin." look at the back, it's pretty good too. raphael saadiq from the bud light outdoor stage. we have a big show out there. next week we'll be joined by adam carolla, topher grace, chaz bono will be here, khloe kardashian odom will be with us, "science bob" pflugfelder will be here. the great albert brooks is going to make an appearance on the show, and we'll have music from christina perri and rammstein. rammstein. so if you like relaxing music, that's your band right there. [ applause ] our first guest is a golden globe-winning and oscar-nominated actor who is pregnant with child. pregnant is very hot in hollywood nowadays. you can see her at the epicenter of romantic entanglement in the new movie "something borrowed," it's in theaters now. please say hello to kate hudson. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
>> jimmy: look at you. you look great. >> i'm so excited. this is the first time i've ever graced and been honored -- >> jimmy: it's great to have you. you brought a friend as well. >> i did, i did. >> jimmy: we got two of you. >> a growing friend. >> jimmy: congratulations. i don't know if you read the magazines but you are pregnant. >> i am. >> jimmy: do you know if you're having a boy or girl? >> i don't. >> jimmy: that's good, like that. everybody wants to know in advance. >> for me it's sort of like i feel like it sort of takes the expectation out of it, know what i mean? >> jimmy: i guess. >> instead you're just thinking -- you're just going, what is it going to be, boy or a girl? >> jimmy: hey, where's the penis? [ laughter ] yeah. >> so yeah, something like that, yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: something like that. [ cheers and applause ] and you're feeling well, i hope? >> feeling pretty good. it's a very different pregnancy. and i'm definitely -- i'm
towards the end so i'm getting tired. >> jimmy: what do you mean when you say it's different? from the last one you mean? it's different? >> from rider, yeah. >> jimmy: is it worse? >> it's -- i think -- i feel like i might be a little more eager to get it going. >> jimmy: i see. >> like when i see my friends having a cocktail this time around, i'm a little bit more like, how many more weeks? like, i just had my birthday and i was sitting there going, you know, everybody's having a great time and drinking and i'm just sitting there, i'm not. >> jimmy: you can't though. it's frowned upon. >> it is. >> jimmy: even though our parents did it and obviously we came out perfect. >> i have one -- i had one person say to me the other day, she's like -- i was like, oh, that martini looks so great. she's like, honey, you're cooked, you're fine. you're fine. like, you got what, what, how many months are you? she's like, that baby's done.
go for it. >> jimmy: you sure it was a she because it sounded like matthew mcconaughey. is he trying to get you drunk while you're pregnant? >> well -- with matthew, you never really know. no, matthew's got more -- matthew's like -- he'd be more -- matthew would be like, listen, hudson -- [ laughter ] i can't even do it. my son does the best matthew mcconaughey impression. >> jimmy: for real? >> no, no, no, seriously. i was actually just saying to somebody backstage that if i could -- if i had the guts to put my son on youtube doing a matthew mcconaughey impersonation -- >> jimmy: it would be huge. >> yeah. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah, it's pretty good. >> jimmy: he's 7 years old. >> 7. >> jimmy: wow -- and is he hanging around with uncle matt a lot? how did he learn this? >> no, i think matthew makes
that kind of impression on people. >> jimmy: really? i don't think i've ever seen a 7-year-old impersonate anybody. >> yeah, well, my son's into it. >> jimmy: he is? >> yeah, he's got all sorts -- >> jimmy: does he walk around with his shirt off and do push-ups? >> he loves those bongos. >> jimmy: do you find yourself with your son -- you find yourself suddenly doing things that your mom or your dad did with you? >> yeah. >> jimmy: besides feeding him and the obvious. >> yeah, not really. i mean, i tried to think about it sometimes because everybody always asks about my mom. >> jimmy: yeah. >> like, what do you do that's like your mom? i'm more like my dad, i'm more like kurt. i'm a little stricter. >> jimmy: is he strict? >> kurt's -- yeah. it depends on the day. like, i remember, we were kids and he was the kind of dad who, like, if we were watching a movie -- there was one time and
we were living in colorado and i remember we were upstairs. i must have been 15 or 16 and we rented "the exorcist." it was, like, i was watching this. my dad came up and was like, amazing, classic movie, one of best movies ever, ever made. and we're watching it. traumatized the [ bleep ] out of me. i literally, like, threw up that night. like -- >> jimmy: was your head facing forward or went backward? >> wherever. wherever i thought my head was. and then i remember like a week later, a week later, my dad, we're watching "major league," baseball, remember that movie? my dad comes up and he's like, what is this? and, like, it's rated "r." do you know how old you are? 16. it's like, we watched "the exorcist." this is, like -- i mean -- >> jimmy: if you have to leave your daughter with the devil or charlie sheen, i think you're going with the devil, right? [ applause ] made the right decision, i
think. >> what was the line, like the slider or something? >> jimmy: the key line in the exorcist was probably worst. >> something a lot more different. >> jimmy: your fiance, is he -- what do you -- he's english, first of all. which is going to be strange because that might get on to the kids, you know, they might start -- >> my son -- >> jimmy: might start being polite. >> like mummy. all of a sudden. actually rider again has a really good accent. >> jimmy: an english accent? >> yeah, he does a great english accent. he's really actually right now he's really into decaf english breakfast tea. >> jimmy: what, why? >> kids, kids. >> jimmy: what do you mean he's into it? it's in his lunch box? >> no, like -- >> jimmy: little thermos full of decaf. >> i think he's getting an overload of p.g. tips these days. his father chris is a p.g. tipper. and then i meet matthew and
matthew's a -- >> jimmy: this is like the lipton of england. >> yeah. so now i'm in search of all decaf english breakfast teas. >> jimmy: really? >> uh-huh. >> jimmy: wow. maybe you're breeding a little prince there is what's happening. does he drink with the pinky out? >> yeah. >> jimmy: 'cause that's the way he should do it. >> there's all sorts of -- yeah, all sorts of different things happening. i'm just trying not to take on too much of it, you know. >> jimmy: yeah, you can't, because you're pregnant, yeah. you don't want the english getting into your womb, you know? >> it is -- it's very much in my womb. >> jimmy: oh. and the baby will be a dual citizen i would think then, huh? >> i think so, yeah. that's kind of cool. >> jimmy: i've always wanted to be a dual citizen. >> really? of what country? >> jimmy: well, mexico. guillermo's trying to get me in. he got out, now he's trying to get me in. we're going to take a quick break. when we come back, we will talk about your new film. kate hudson is here. "something borrowed" is in theaters now.
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>> jimmy: we're back with kate hudson. her movie is called "something borrowed." back to your son for a second. >> okay. >> jimmy: well, hope this happens. one day he does this matthew mcconaughey thing. it would be great. >> i hope so too. he will. he can't help it. >> jimmy: are you worried he's going to start talking like madonna? i mean, because with your husband being english, you've got to do something -- put him maybe in a school in alabama or something. >> maybe it's a good thing. maybe it's a good thing. maybe it's a good thing. because, you know, i get corrected a lot. we have this thing -- matt and i have this thing now where it's like every time he says a word -- i like to be right. >> jimmy: well, sure. really? >> i mean, i don't know why. but -- and so every time he says a word that sounds kind of funny to me, i kind of give him a look. and he goes, oh, no, it's the way you pronounce the word. >> jimmy: he says it's -- his way is correct. >> this way is correct.
>> jimmy: like what words? >> well, there's a bunch of them. the one that was the big one was urinal. it's urinal he says. >> jimmy: what? >> it's not urinal. >> jimmy: sounds -- >> i go, it's urinal. we got into a big thing about it. he went into a dictionary. which now i'm kind of like -- surrender, he's always right. it's urinal. >> jimmy: no, it's not. not in my america it isn't. it's urinal. really? you realize if you said where's the urinal, some people would have no idea what you're talking about. >> nor know how to spell it. >> jimmy: does he say urine also? >> that was my point. see, that's exactly my argument. i'm like, you don't say urine, you say urine. >> jimmy: yeah, it's like
uriness i guess. it's a very english thing. >> yeah, no. and we're wrong. >> jimmy: we are. >> we're wrong. >> jimmy: i still think we're right. by virtue of the fact we won that war, we're right on all counts. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. so this movie. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's a -- is it proper to say it's a romantic comedy? >> um, yeah -- i mean, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: okay. >> i guess if you have to sell something -- >> jimmy: you have to give it a label of some kind. >> this would be romantic comedy. >> jimmy: i got you. >> but it's definitely a little -- the subject matter is not really rom-com material. >> jimmy: what is the subject matter? >> infidelity. sleeping with friend's fiances. >> jimmy: oh. >> oh, my god. >> jimmy: it's a dram-com. dramatic romantic comedy. use that.
>> that is awesome. >> jimmy: thank you. you know what, that can replace urinal in your home. >> i'm going to start correcting everybody on that. how do you like rom-com? it's a dram-com. >> jimmy: who else is in the movie? >> jennifer goodwin. >> jimmy: a good group. >> really fun. really cool. we shot the whole thing in new york which was great. and yeah, it was -- >> jimmy: we have a clip here of the movie, as we usually do. i think it may need to be set up a little bit. or maybe not. >> i know what it is. isn't that crazy? >> jimmy: why don't you tell us? usually people don't. >> they don't? >> jimmy: yeah. >> i came prepared. >> jimmy: okay. >> what's the -- it's the clip -- it's the clip where i'm having sort of a slumber party with jennifer's character and my
fiance ends up coming to, like, a 3:00 in the morning i guess booty call-type situation and i'm there and i think it's the john character, i don't know it's -- >> jimmy: well, it's a dram-com, think that says enough. "something borrowed." >> can i come up? i just want to talk. >> who is it? >> ethan. >> ethan? >> ethan? no, it's dex. i'm downstairs. can i see you? >> wait, you're downstairs? no. no, no, no. darcy's here so -- >> and he wants to come up at 3:00 in the morning. >> i'm going to -- >> oh, my god. ew. >> what? >> ew! ewww! oh, my god! you are having a fling with ethan? >> jimmy: you can't have a fling with ethan.
>> no. [ applause ] >> jimmy: it's great to see you. i wish you best of luck and best of health. kate hudson, everybody. "something borrowed" is in theaters right now. we'll be back. you're gonsome . i have? with lleft behind. at's why there'sstrong. vers brand. you sure yes i do. fewer piec female announcer ]y it a little? fresh and reshmates.
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>> jimmy: welcome back. still to come, raphael saadiq. our next guest wheeled a hand truck full of beer into america's hearts in his very popular tv commercials. now, through the magic of hollywood, he's deputy chief medical examiner curtis brumfield on the show "body of proof." you can watch the season finale tuesday night at 10:00 here on abc. please welcome windell middlebrooks. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
>> pleasure! your band is jamming, man. all right. ya'll cutting up over there. go ahead. [ applause ] >> jimmy: now, i want to point out the correct pronunciation of your name, and you correct me if i'm wrong, is windell, not windell, even though it's spelled windell kind of. >> it's windell. >> jimmy: windell. >> no windell. that's extra work. >> jimmy: no windell. >> yes. see, you don't have to do extra work. >> jimmy: i think it's important to know that and for people to kind of get it straight. >> you know what, as long as you don't call me bobby or tommy or something i don't know you talking to me, we good. >> jimmy: what does your mom call you? >> she calls me dwayne. >> jimmy: she does? >> 'cause that's my middle name. so we'll be sitting at dinner or something and she'll be like, dwayne, pass me the salt. then, who the hell is dwayne? so that's what they call me at my house so -- >> jimmy: all right, all right, in your private life, you're dwayne but when you're in your superhero costume, you're windell. where are you from? >> ft. worth, texas.
>> jimmy: ft. worth, texas. >> yeah, born and raised. >> jimmy: very nice. [ applause ] it's remarkable. because it's pretty rare that somebody becomes popular from a tv commercial. a lot of times you see people already famous will do a commercial. but every once in a while, you get a, you know, a max headroom or a joe isuzu or a you that comes out of nowhere. and becomes -- like people are like, i like that guy a lot. >> i tell you what, i'm very thankful that commercial took off because it started as one commercial. then it turned into a huge campaign. and we living the high life, ya'll know that, you know. so it's about common sense but i think we started a commonsense movement. so from that, it just grew and grew and grew and, like you said, now i'm on "body of proof." so i'm snatching beer on one day and then i'm a doctor on the next. so there you go. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you know, when you go to a -- yeah, i guess that's -- that's going to be -- as the show becomes more popular, that's going to become weirder and weirder. do you have to bring the beer now if you go to a party?
you come to somebody's house? >> you know what, that has been one of my biggest headaches. >> jimmy: for real? >> yes, because i get invited to stuff all the time and i know the only reason is because they want me to show up with beer. i got news for them. my mom makes a good pecan pie. i'm going to show up with a pecan pie and see if i get the same love. >> jimmy: so you don't have a dolly in the back of your car that you bring around to these parties? >> no, i don't. i go in -- i go with it -- >> jimmy: does mom get free beer? >> let me tell ya'll what happened. this is a story. so when i first started this, you know, mom would come and say, we need some more beer at the house. so then i would call and then get her hooked up. what happens is whatever city i'm in or whatever i can call the distributor. they'll deliver it or i can go pick it up. >> jimmy: you'll call and say "my mom needs beer?" >> "my mom needs beer." you know? well, as time went along, she stops calling me. so i'm like, maybe she stopped drinking the beer. i don't know.
but what happened what she got her own hookup -- >> jimmy: oh, really? >> move the middle man out of the way. "i call rubin today. i got three 12 packs. i'm good to go. he met me in the parking lot of walmart." they're having some shady exchanges or something, you know, of 12 packs. she's like, i don't need you anymore. >> jimmy: nice, there you go. >> that's how it work. >> jimmy: hey, i heard you were an exchange student. which i'm interested in. like, me, i would never have been that adventurous. i was scared to leave the house really, never mind go to another country, but you went to indonesia. >> i went to indonesia. i actually traded, you know, a car. so instead of getting a car at 16, i took a trip to be an exchange student. for six weeks. because i weather i was in eighth grade, i hosted an exchange student. when i was in 11th grade, i went over to jar carta and bali, and spent six weeks,
touring around the country standing with my host family. >> jimmy: was the exchange student you hosted from indonesia as well? >> i hosted imam and then met his best friend ogi. imam went to college. >> jimmy: ogi? >> ogi. that was his name. >> jimmy: that's a good name. >> so i stayed with ogi when i went to indonesia. >> jimmy: so dwayne and ogi in indonesia. >> kicking it up in indonesia. >> jimmy: you stayed with his family, lived in their house? >> his family lived in jakarta and then i lived with him in a big house with two servants. >> jimmy: really, with servants? >> with two servants. >> jimmy: he had servants? >> he had servants. >> jimmy: wow. >> i tell you, it took a lot for me to get used to that. you know what i mean? because i would come home every day, you know, you're out touring the city and you're see everything. i come in and then i would drop clothes in the room and take a shower. and then by the time i come back, they're gone. now, this never happens at my house. you have to put them in the hamper. >> jimmy: your mom's drunk all the time, sounds like. [ applause ] >> well, she sobered up -- >> jimmy: wow, so that's pretty great. >> yeah, and so every day, i would be so thankful, you know,
i would tip her, you know, and leave tips on the bed. so when i go to the shower, leave the tips on the bed and clothes on the floor because i know they'll be gone. i come back and then i got in trouble by my host brother because i'm not supposed to tip. he's like, you can buy her gifts, but you can't tip. he said, this is our culture. you know, don't change up things. >> jimmy: wow. >> so i would buy gifts every day. >> jimmy: what kind of stuff? >> scarfs, flowers, books from where i go. >> jimmy: she probably thought you were in love with her. >> she probably did. but let me tell you what, so when i went to indonesia, my mom packed toilet paper and starch in my suitcase. >> jimmy: really? >> i introduced her to starch and you thought i gave her gold. >> jimmy: really? >> oh, i did. because she would iron my clothes. you put starch, it's smooth. she took the can and kept the can. it was like i gave her gold. that was the best gift could i have gave her. >> jimmy: that's a beautiful thing. your mom sent starch with you to indonesia. >> she's like, you cannot go to indonesia wrinkled.
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>> jimmy: this is his new album, it's called "stone rollin'." here with the song, "stone rollin'," raphael saadiq! ♪ ♪ that lady shakin' backbone breakin' come on this girl of mine ♪ ♪ everything she's got is movin' and hot come on this girl of mine ♪ ♪ i was just a friend but she took me in said come on this girl of mine ♪ ♪ everything was right i felt like the light
said come on this girl of mine ♪ ♪ you make a blind man walk away from home you'll tell your girlfriend you wanna be alone ♪ ♪ it makes an old man throw away his cane girl what your booty doing i just can't explain ♪ ♪ listen ♪ you don't call her fat but that girl is stacked come on she's got my mind ♪ ♪ everything is wide she walk with much pride come on she's got my mind ♪ ♪ top chef and cook with grandma's looks now come on she's got my mind ♪ ♪ there was no way to prepare nothing i could see all i saw was a woman walking up to me ♪ ♪ she's got my mind
♪ now big booty woman turn me loose i need to go home i can't stand your moves ♪ ♪ you see your high heels are killing me it's like a valentine's heart shaking me ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm your lover man and i won't let go i wanna stay with you you can lock the door ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm your lover man and i won't let go i wanna stay with you you can lock the door ♪ ♪ movin' so fast so back to me i'm gonna squeeze you darlin', endlessly ♪ ♪ big booty woman turn mos